cattle mutilation

2025-05

he holds a frog, she holds a swan.

connection is lovely

2026.04.09

[deeper]

cattle mutilation breathes and listens. watch your step, and be nice to it. please.

last update: 9 April 2026.

forge a trail back to this place?

this site is link free. that means you can link or unlink it at will without asking for permission. still, i'd love to know if you do.

so stupid

not actually a 3 year old rabbit. not even a teenage girl pretending to be one. sadly.

[unrefined]

a website that isn't.

for my off-colour thoughts and things that just don't belong on my other websites. on cattle mutilation there are fanpages, recounts, half-formed thoughts, and so on. a dumping ground of sorts.

plus, it's an excuse to play with darker layouts. if you are familiar with my other sites, you will know i actually (somehow) prefer cuter aesthetics. this is a side project, and for that i am thankful, but it's one with a lot of love put into it.

this place is one big web, so please remember to click around. don't know how deep i want to go with this, though. i still have a filter. i'm not an idiot (anymore/yet)

cattle mutilation is designed for widescreen computers. i guess 4:3 aspect ratio isn't widescreen, but i think that's fine too, if that's your setup. if you're visiting on a mobile device, come back later on your desktop or laptop computer. [why?]

do you feel stuck?

the world turns all the same. use it to your advantage

Cattle mutilation is the killing and mutilation of cattle under supposedly unusual, usually bloodless circumstances. Reportedly removed parts often include an ear, eyeball, jaw flesh, tongue, lymph nodes, genitals and rectum. Reports began in the late 1960s and continued into the 1980s. In that era, mutiliations were the subject of multiple independent investigations in the United States.

Many so-called mutilations are explainable as natural decomposition and normal predation. Multiple lines of evidence suggest some of the deaths might have been the result of an organized effort. Meanwhile, conspiracy theorists suggest cults, aliens, or cryptid (such as the chupacabra) were responsible.

— our foe Wikipedia

the truth is that "cattle mutilation" was taken from a certain source, but that source is a secret. learn on your own or befriend me for the answer.

relationships

several friends have asked me if my house is "a place to hang out at", or "a place they can go to". this surprised me. the notion of it surprises me, i guess.

my house is a place for anyone. i'd enjoy having people over more than once a month. it's simply inconvenient situations that lead to nobody coming over, that and my terrible social impairments.

but... slowly yet surely, i'm gaining real social interaction... and it scares me. it's intimidating. i would like my house to become that place that people can just stay at, in the future.

there are people i knew seven years ago whose lives have changed drastically. we are trying to deal with this. it's a wonder that we can talk at all. it's still strange that these people are not really the image i invented in my head back then and, instead, better people now

it's hard to keep up with all of that. i dunno.

my girlfriend is always urging me to do things i wouldn't have before. it's a positive force, but it does embarrass me. i started using special cleanser for my face. it's slimy.

and other things

i still draw with pencils i owned when i was in primary school, and before i moved across the city at that. i was seven years old at most when i last used these regularly, and now i am using them again. isn't that strange?

the outdoor mall in the city doesn't feel like it did when i was a child, except for when it gets dark. when it gets dark, and all the lights are on, i finally feel like i'm somewhere truly great

dagashi-kashi

Dagashi Kashi are a punk-rock band from Tokyo formed in 1998. They wear kimonos and white makeup and perform heavy songs about Shinto deities, Buddhism, menstrual pain and lesbian cannibalism.

[learn]

2026.04.09

♰ i got my grandmother a gift. she hugged me.

♰ a stranger asked what music i like and was shocked by "DEVO"

♰ my best friend is a fish

2026.04.01

[more?]

2025.06.08

i had decided, the night before, that i would go on a long walk. to clear my head, to have something to do. to not rot at home all day. to spend my time drawing and reading and such. the point is that i need to get out of the hole i'm in and do something with my life.

[deeper]

2025.06.30

nobody puts up music rotations anymore. why would they? most people don't have their own sites, and with things like streaming, handing out MP3s might as well be obsolete.

for fun, here is a playlist that may change from time to time. not all songs will be readily available on spotify, so consider it a gift from me to you.

let's exchange music; email me something you like?

[listen]